As you may have already figured out, the cast and crew of My Simulated Reality TV Life - quite possibly the most critically-acclaimed simulated reality series of all-time - is on summer holidays, probably lying in the sun at some Caribbean beach, sipping piña coladas. But instead of making you sit and watch reruns like all of the other shows in prime time, we here at starfish and waffles are going to do you one better and run a clip show, complete with new scenes you've never seen before! Now, if you're one of the few people out there who have yet to see an episode of My Simulated Reality TV Life, you're pathetic and need to get a life ... but luckily, it's not too late for you so click here and start at Episode One! For everyone else, let's get to the clips!
In the beginning ... the simulated me, living the unglamorous simulated life. Plunge, simulated Felix, plunge!
But then Bridgette comes along ...
... and she decides to marry simulated Felix after less than 20 minutes of courtship! Now that's love at first sight, people.
Naturally, love at first sight leads to much snuggling, kissing, and tons of hot, dirty sex (woohoo!) ... which, inevitably, creates ...
A new baby! Enter scene right: little Felicia ...
... who grows up faster than our writers can properly write her into the script. But here, we have a great shot of the toddler playing in the toilet!
Meanwhile, simulated Felix and Bridgette adjust to life in suburbia and its occassional boredom ... but that's ok ... because the happy couple know how to make their own fun!
Happily, there are plenty of friends in the neighbourhood - like simulated Penny. Refer to the scene above: what are simulated Penny and simulated Felix doing? You tell me!
And even better, there are always zany new characters to meet. For instance, who is this mysterious stranger in the scene above? She could be a Lakers fan. She could be a famous world traveller. She might even contemplate topping off her lemon bars with salsa and guacamole. But one thing is for sure - she's hot! Make sure you stay tuned for future episodes of My Simulated Reality TV Life and find out why she has a toilet on her front lawn!
Finally, a few closing thoughts expressed by Felicia's outspoken teddy bear to simulated Felix and Bridgette: "I make beautiful, beautiful music for a living. Well, sort of. Replace the word 'beautiful' with 'sweet' and the word 'music' with 'love.' Oh, baby!"